fall reflections

Fall Moments

/ nagneberg48 / 4 Comments

October 24, 2023

1. Fall Traditions: Apple Orchard and Meandering Roads

Yes, I can buy local apples in the grocery store, but at least once during the fall off to an apple orchard we must go. Along with hundreds of other people, of course, but we were there early and made our purchase of apples, apple cider donuts, applecrisp and hard cider.

Walking towards the apple barn, we watched all the young families–kids in strollers, kids on Dads’ shoulders, kids leaping and skipping ahead of theirs parents, kids holding their grandparents’ hands; kids not wanting to hold hands. Bruce wondered if we were ever that young. Soooo long ago.

After leaving the orchard, we drove north along the St Croix River. Has there ever been such a gorgeous fall? Of course, there probably has, but we are in the moment; moments of glimmering, shimmering, blazing and sparkly color. Where bareness is beginning to take over, I notice the many homes tucked within the woods or beyond fields, and, I admit, I envy the quiet and their views.

2. Fall Transitions Closer to Home

Outside–on our block and in the garden, such glory. Bruce is scurrying, like the squirrels, to prepare the garden for the winter. Last year we had our first snow on October 14, so the clock is ticking.

The Paris Garden, October 14, 2022

Inside, I have added throws to some of the chairs, and spices are simmering on the stove.

3. Fall Treasures

This small hand-painted plate was one of my mother’s fall treasures, and at some point I made it my own. I am sure she bought it at an antique shop some place, and I don’t remember quite how she used it. In an arrangement on the small coffee table in front of the family room couch, maybe? It is perfect for a stick of butter, I think.

This little piece was painted by Lena Thompson, and I wonder who she was. What was her story? China painting was a popular profession and hobby in the United States beginning in the 1870’s, but continued into the early 20th century. This was an acceptable art form for women and for many women a way to make some money, but I imagine it was also a way to add the decorative arts to one’s own home. Did women get together in each other’s homes to paint, similar to quilting bees? I think about the friendships formed, the wisdom shared–along with coffee and cookies, of course.

These days when I decorate for the seasons I think about what I might bring with me if/when it is time to take the next step into a different and smaller living situation. This is one of those sweet pieces I might bring with me. A mug of cider could rest on it or a candle or yes, a stick of butter, and it wouldn’t take up much room in a cupboard, but it carries memories of my mother and her love of collecting and keeping a beautiful home. And it makes me think of women like Lena who eagerly and beautifully lived a creative life.

4. Fall Fun

When I opened the front door to put a letter in the mailbox, I heard giggling. Leah, one of the kids next door, urged

her little sister, “More, Maya, More.” They were burying their brother in a pile of leaves. One toe emerged. One finger lifted out of the golden pile. “More, Maya, More.”

5. Fall Fright

Actually, I smile more than scream.

6. A Fall Thought from Joyce Rupp and My Prayer for You

Autumn is a royal season. To temper the necessary disrobing of the glory of summer, autumn dons a coat of many colors, for beauty softens departure. Autumn holds fragments of the other seasons in transformative arms…Each season’s entrance and departure is part of the gracious turning of the circle of life. from The Circle of Life, The Heart’s Journey Through the Season By Joyce Rupp and Macrina Wiederkehr.

May this fall open you to beauty and lead you gently into the next season of your life.

May these fall days hold you and all that is falling within you.

May fall make room for what is most important and for the ways you can offer yourself.

Amen.

An Invitation

What fall moments will become a fall memory? I would love to know.

Bittersweet

/ nagneberg48 / Leave a comment 
One of the treasures of the fall is the bittersweet plant with its clusters of bright orange pods. 
In the past when we roamed country roads at this time of the year, we have been on the look-out for bittersweet vines entwined around roadside vegetation. How triumphant we felt if we found some.

One year when we were still living at Sweetwater Farm a friend who lived at the base of a mountain in Pennsylvania sent me a large box full of bittersweet she had harvested on her property, and I swagged it along the white picket fence from the driveway to the backdoor. Such lavishness! Such luxury, especially since bittersweet is quite expensive to buy in nurseries or other stores.

Another year neighbors invited us to go with them to an area where bittersweet grew in abundance. The owner of the property had given permission to cut as much as we wanted. I suspect he thought we were all a bit crazy as we filled the back of the Jeep.

I no longer have to scrounge country roads hoping to find this fall treat, however, for a couple years ago my husband planted bittersweet in our backyard, and how delighted I was this year to cut the scraggly branches and fill containers with clusters of the orange berries.

I welcomed their beauty as one more signal of the transition from one season to another, but on the other hand how could I ignore the implication of the name itself? Bittersweet.

Bittersweet

Bitter Sweet

The mix of bitter and sweet.

Sometimes this stage of my life –elderhood– feels like a mix of bitter and sweet.

On the one hand I relish the freedom and flexibility of this age. For the most part I decide how to use my time and energy. But on the other hand I look back and see how time has passed so quickly. How is it possible that I am in my 70’s and our kids in their 40’s! And as for my energy–well, I still am able to do a lot in one day, but more and more I need to pay attention to how I use my energy.

I treasure all the gifts of my life, but at the same time I wonder how well I have lived those gifts–shared them, developed them, honored them. Some days I delight in the memories and stories of earlier years and other days I feel the gloom of regret. The echoes of what I should have done, could have done.

How grateful I am for the love woven throughout my life. So many cherished relationships, but now is also the time of loss. In this last year how many times have I tucked a vintage handkerchief into a sympathy card and written words I hope bring some comfort and connection?

Bitter. Sweet.

Joan Chittister refers to the bitter and the sweet of this stage of life as blessings and burdens. Both are present. Both are real. Both need to be acknowledged. Here’s what she has to say about the blessings and burdens of regret, for example, in her book The Gift of Years, Growing Older Gracefully.

The burden of regret is that, unless we come to understand the value of the choices we made in the past, we may fail to see the gifts they have brought us.

The blessing of regret is clear–it brings us, if we are willing to face it head on, to the point of being present to this new time of life in an entirely new way. It urges us on to continue becoming. (p. 5)

Bitter. Sweet.

Shadow and Light.

Or as our thirteen year old grandson Peter said when I asked him after his sister left for freshman year of college what it was like to be the only kid in the house, “The good news is I am the only kid. The bad news is I am the only kid.”

Bitter. Sweet.

Shadow and Light.

Blessing and Burden.

Yes.

An Invitation: How do you experience the presence of the bitter and the sweet in your life? I would love to know.